I drove by a tennis academy yesterday. I found myself wondering… what if Baby Girl had decided to do a different sport?
We went to a ballet/dance class when she was 3 or 4. She said no. I asked her if she wanted to do gymnastics camp when she was 4 or 5. She said no. We took a handful of karate classes when she was 6. Even bought the cute little pink outfit. She wore it twice. Do you want to do drama? Theatres and plays? Nope. No way. Soccer? You’ve got to be kidding. I hate to ask, but do you want to be a cheerleader? Absolutely not! Well is there anything else you want to try, besides horses? No Mama, I am a rider!
Well, the kid breathed in horses since before she was born so really, it was a fair chance that she would want to ride. And she loved ponies from the get-go, two years old and begging to ride with her tiny helmet on her head and a lead rope in her hand.
I love this sport, don’t get me wrong. But it just hits different when it’s your own kid doing it. I’m the trainer – I don’t make much money. And every show she goes to, everything she is wearing, everything the pony is wearing, is paid for by my training fees. So now I make even less money.
Would I be so heart-in-my-throat watching her compete if she was chasing a fuzzy little yellow ball? Would that racquet have to cost a minimum of $25,000 just for her to be competitive? And I’m not even talking about National, rated shows. But LOCAL shows. Shows in this metroplex. You’ve got to have the pony. And you’ve got to feed it, house it, and keep it cool or warm, depending on the time of year. You’ve got to clean up after it, give it shots and de-wormers, have the farrier and equine dentist come at set times per year. You’ve got to pay for all of that. A gym might require a membership but that’s where your investment in the facility ends. It’s not your problem (unless you own the gym).
And that pony has thoughts and opinions. Plenty of them. If she was up there on the stage would I wonder if it was going to run away with her or buck her off? If she was dancing, would I have to put ear poms in so she’s not affected by the noise? If she was doing karate chops would I fret about the fairness of adults competing against her? If she was kicking soccer balls would I wonder about the advantages of a flying lead change and the fact that our green pony is still learning them? Thus creating a disadvantage for them in the show ring.
I’m sure other sports all have their things that are worrisome, unfair, etc. I don’t know about any of them. But I do know horses, and showing, and how hard it is. You might win a blue ribbon on any given day, you might win nothing at all. You could have the same exact round on both days and winning a ribbon or not would totally depend on how the other people rode, who the judge is, what happened in the ring and the weather. It’s a tough sport. Maybe your pony doesn’t like to ride in the rain. I had one take off with a kid once because it started sprinkling. Another one refused to move because the arena had standing water and he didn’t like the splash on his belly.
And then there’s the exhausted kid at the end of the day. Who still has to take care of her pony. She has to untack it, hose it down, give it water and make sure it’s comfortable in the stall or at the trailer with a bunch of hay to pacify it. That’s hard for a little kid who just wants and needs to be done. Because you CAN’T say “Oh I will do that for you.” If you do it once you’ll do it every time. And what does the kid learn then? All play and no work…. that just isn’t the thing to teach when it comes to horses! The horse can’t take care of itself… unlike the soccer ball it needs attention. So choose your sport wisely.
She’s a born rider. She couldn’t help that. She’s got natural ability and the correct body to be a small pony rider for a very long time if she wants. She’s got grit and determination and she is tough as nails. She fell off the other day for a second time in one day (pony was being a shit) and she stood up and grabbed a handful of dirt to throw at the pony’s retreating backside while she cried angry tears. Then she got back on. She knows enough not to take her frustration out on the pony but she still needs reminding sometimes. Being tough is not a lack of tears. Being tough is getting back on and fixing the problem.
Where was I when I was ten? I was nowhere near her stage of ability. I was still just learning to post and then canter. I couldn’t do a hand gallop, an extended trot or a halt from said hand gallop. I couldn’t jump two feet. A friend at the Welsh show asked how old she is, then said she was still flopping around on the horses’ backs at age 10. She’s certainly not the youngest or most accomplished rider of her age, but she HAS accomplished a lot, especially in terms of personal growth. Where would she be if she wasn’t riding?
So I know there is a lot to be said for this sport. There’s a lot of positives. And negatives. It’s not recognized in public schools which I think is a load of crap. You have to be in high school and do off campus PE for riding to mean anything to the public school system. She won’t be in high school for four more years. Thus the home schooling really works out well for us.
And the ribbons are starting to mean less. She loves to win, don’t get me wrong. But she’s upset if she wins and her friend doesn’t. She’s probably also upset if her friend wins, and she doesn’t. Naturally. She is learning that winning is only amazing if you had a great ride with your pony. She’ll come out of the ring grinning ear to ear and I know she’s proud of herself. Winning the Medal round at the one show where she had terrible rounds, minus that one, was a terrific lesson in perseverance. And that hard work pays off. And that the pony won’t always cooperate, and you still have to ride what you have.
She’s learned and grown so much in the last year alone, and I’m exceedingly proud of who she’s becoming.
But still I wonder… a tennis ball doesn’t have an attitude…
